kissing toads

the type of people we are attracted to says a lot about who we are and where we are in our life.

not all the people we are attracted to or that we attract are suitable for lasting relationships. it is tempting to act on our instant attractions but the past has shown us that the result isn’t often in our best interests, won’t get us what we want or will not allow for our needs to be met.

some of us have a hard time seeing what is right in front of us. we are blinded by projections, urges or wishful thinking.

it is important to see who someone is today, and not be seduced by their potential. it is essential to see clearly without rationalizing, explaining or analyzing what someone does, says or how they make us feel.

sometimes this process is slow and frustrating. it can be seductive to follow our instincts, our chemistry and repeat unhealthy compulsions but we are learning from our mistakes and trying to alter our self-sabotaging patterns.

looking for what is good for us is a clue. being with people that make us feel valuable, meaningful and cherished…without strings or conditions. the more we learn to respect and care for ourselves, the more naturally we will find ourselves attracting people that reflect that genuinely back to us.

love is not a magic wand. kissing toads does not turn them into princes. many of us have been taught that we were only deserving of love if we acted a certain way, did certain things or just tried harder…this is not true. the more we work through these issues, the less we will need to reenact them in our relationships. as we learn to believe we are worthy of being loved, the more we will find love that is worth our while.

* photo credit: doris day and brian keith "with six you get eggroll"